I bet the banking industry is currently wishing the world
had ended last week when the boffins turned on their
inter-dimensional transmogrifier. It's a shame the banks forgot to read their own small print. Y'know, all that stuff about if you can't pay back what you borrow then they're going to take all your shit away. Still, as a concerned citizen and tax payer, I'm glad to be helping out with the democratic ideal that the sins of the few shall be visited upon (and paid for by) the many. I hate to think of all those highly bonused executives left struggling after the weight of such responsibility. I mean, what else can we do? Take them out and beat them to death with their own wallets live on tv?
Of course not.
I've also been amused as to how the potential VP of Disneyland thought it was a good idea to
compare hard-working women to a species best known for being
bred for mindless violence by feckless fascist fuckwits. Is that better or worse though than not being able to distinguish the difference between a
Pit Bull and a Pig? Regardless, I'm definitely not going round theirs for Sunday lunch. At least she's not a
technophobe, unlike her boss, although she
may want to read our very own
Data Handling Review for some useful tips and pointers. That the old timer doesn't use email is probably a good idea, however, as it's
one less thing for the White House to lose if the 'Publicans do get in again.
Equally amusing, but with less global impact was the
Madonna Wembley gig. Apparently the Madonna crew refused to hook up the sound to Wembley's own top tier PA, so no wonder no-one could hear. Her spokesperson shrugged it off with a wonderfully modern take on the
Koan: "I was at the gig and the sound was fine." In other words, if your fans are having a shit time and can't hear, and you can't tell (because you're in the good seats), are your fans really having a shit time and unable to hear anything? This 'spokesperson' is quite clearly an imbecile of astronomic proportions. Their excuse for the late running of the show was just as good, "stage times are only guidelines". Reminds me of the Zimbabwean train timetable we found that stated the departure times were the times before which the train may not leave. Oh, that was back in '89 btw. So although I'm
sooooooooooooo pleased that Madge has adopted London as her physical home - hey neighbour, cup of sugar? - quite clearly someone has forgotten to tell her about our transport system, buses, trains, tubes etc, engineering works, no way out of Wembley after sunset. Never mind.
Perhaps she should hire Mark Owen-Lloyd as her spokesperson, whose only crime was to
tell it like it is. Which is of course a bug fucking mistake in these enlightened times. I'll gladly add my name to all those official figures who labelled his comments as "inapproprate", because I truly feel that the potential suffering and possible deaths to some suffering from the rising cost of energy bills is indeed, inappropriate.
Reading: Charlie Brooker's Screenburn
